Dancing in the kitchen

I pretty much hate my kitchen. It really isn’t a great space for me. It’s so small and cramped and dark. It’s so small that I can sit on one counter and reach the other counter with my feet…and I’m short people. Plus the lighting is terrible, and since I hate doing dishes, I tend to want to avoid that room entirely.


I do like to cook. Not all the time, of course, and I haven’t quite figured out how to attempt something simple like a hamburger, but right now I’m totally into soup and greens. So on an occasional night, I’ll let lose my inner Diva Chef, and go to town, and for me, the right music makes all the difference. Granted, it takes me longer to cook because I spend a ton of time shaking my ass and drinking wine. But there is nothing like listening to the sexy Danzig serenade me…fucking damn! He’s amazing.


Damn. Back to the cooking thing…well, really, the dancing thing. I love to dance and cook at the same time. It makes cooking such a better experience for me…could be the wine too, but just saying. I also bought an immersion blender so that has helped shorten my time spent in the kitchen as well as helped out immensely. Please note, if you enjoy soups or shakes…buy one of those. It’s delightful.

As lame as it sounds, I’ve added some personality to my kitchen to replace the drabness. It really is the small things that I’ve added or changed that have made being in my kitchen a much more pleasant experience. I’ve put some color into the room, added a speaker for my iPod…And since I am only cooking for myself, it’s great that I can try whatever I want without the pressure. No pressure that someone is grumpy and hungry, no pressure that they want something simple instead of the elaborate and scrumptious meal I am preparing them…it’s all about me eating what I want, when I want and after I have satisfied my need to express myself with my body.

Since I’ve started making these smaller changes (and the obvious big change of forging ahead solo), I’ve decided my soups are succulent and melt my palette, my “quickie greens” are delicious and rejuvenating and I have to admit…my new tofu chocolate shake is surprisingly savory. (BTW: shout out to Pinterest here for the amazing recipes I am always finding. So many great ideas there. Thank you!!)

Point is, it’s the small things that have helped me find the beauty of my kitchen, and really, isn’t that how it is with many things in life? The small things that pick you up and make you smile. It’s hard to remember that sometimes when all the shit is going down and people are walking all over your heart and soul. So much anger and resentment in the world tend to consume and overwhelm me. Really, it drains me…You know that part in TrueBlood where Sookie finds out she is a fairy and that Bill, as a vampire, is stealing her light? Well, I’ve definitely had my vampire…so there is very little light in me right now. But it’s these small things, an hour enjoyed seducing Danzig over the radio waves, stirring some soup and drinking some wine…that make me appreciate that even Darkness Screams in the Midst of Beauty.

Darkness Screams in the Midst of Beauty painting

Hope is Beautiful

Beauty. It’s something that exists everywhere. We refer to beautiful people and we can mean their both them externally and internally. Friends are beautiful. Hope is one of those friends. Yes, I get the irony that the idea of Hope is beautiful and can help you get through the toughest times. I lose Hope sometimes. And I mean that in the idea of Hope, and the Hope that is my friend.


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Hope and I aren’t always consistent talkers. Life moves us forward and our interactions wax and wane like the moon. But we do manage to reconnect, and nothing changes. Granted, it takes a few hours to catch up on the stories of what’s been happening. And some of it is very “girl-talk” and cliche. But by the third bottle of wine, our souls have connected once again and we move into the realm of beauty. Of what it means to be real. What it means to be emotional and how we work through those moments. I was able to capture a raw moment of reflection for Hope. It was amazing and I hope she doesn’t mind if I share this video.



Hope Is Beautiful


It’s amazing the connections you can have with people if you open your heart to them. I learned a few great things that night. Emotions are good, when in moderation and in control, a true friend is always by your side, no matter where you are ;), you’re beautiful when you least expect it, and it really is a terrible idea to drunk-text.